Today you are in for a special treat. I wrote something that I wanted to put on here, and I thought I wrote in my journal, but I can't seem to find it. So instead I am just going to put some other random things of interest (to me anyway!) that I found in my journal. Some of them make me laugh...


"I wonder if I'm making a big mistake. If I didn't wonder, would that mean I am doing the right thing?

I wonder if doing nothing would be just that--nothing. Or would that be a mistake as well?

On and on I wonder until my head becomes wrinkled like an old woman's hands, like a raisin, like my hands after a long shower. Slowly the wrinkles fold in on themselves. My brain is contracting, shrinking bit by bit. The wrinkles are now deep lines. My face becomes expressionless and my eyes stare ahead at nothing. Suddenly, my body goes limp and collapses to the waiting floor. My brain wraps itself into a tight little ball and rolls away.

Still, I go on wondering...what if?"
I believe this was meant to reveal to myself how stupid it is to sit around and wonder about stuff instead of getting out there and doing things. I love poking fun at myself. It's so easy and so amusing.




"It is a photo shoot and I am the star model. My dress is red and sparkly, attention-getting. My lips and nails glitter with the same vivacious, living red.

The room is large and brilliant white, against which the photographer and his camera stand out like ink on a wedding gown. The only other objects in the room are large, colorful signs, props that I lean against glamorously. I drape one arm over a sign, letting my wrist show off a diamond bracelet. I perch on another sign, crossing my legs elegantly. I throw my head back and laugh. I turn around and peek over my shoulder at the photographer with a shy, sweet smile that is also sneakingly cunning. All the while, the camera clicks away. Photo after photo after photo...of me. Self-assured, spotlight-stealing me.

A few weeks later, I get the photos. There are dozens of them. My red dress and I are undeniably the center of attention in each shot, but it is the props, the signs, that take my breath away. Each sign boasts an arrow in bold primaries and the word "Blame" in fat black letters. Each arrow points straight to my smiling face.

What have I done?"
A look at the sinful nature of man...there is no denying it. I can't imagine living without God. All those signs would be yelling in my face day after day and there would be No One who could take them away and tell me He has forgiven me...



"God opens doors and God closes doors. Sometimes they look closed, but when you grasp the handle and pull, they aren't locked. That's when God wants you to work a little and not give up. But other times I seem to grasp a very obviously locked door and tug with all my strength. Finally I fall to the floor exhausted, crying, "God, why did this happen to me?" And as tears spill out of my eyes I finally notice the huge sign above the door: "Exit this way," with a big arrow. "But God," I whimper, "I want to go through THIS door! It looks so pretty!" My own words echo in the empty room and I cringe as they return to my ears. This is the point where I should pick myself up and humbly go find the right door."
That one doesn't need much explanation.