Defeated soccer team exuberant over best loss yet
The Hedgehogs' captain scored one point in tonight's game against the ominous "yellow guys", putting the final score at 1-6. Ross Cerbus led the team to sweet defeat with a goal in the second half.
Sara Young, Hedgehog player, benchwarmer and cheerleader, said, "It was amazing. I've never seen that happen before." Young declined to comment on why she is on a soccer team in the Men's Open division.
John Cavanaugh, another Hedgehog player, said, "I smell victory!" *
Stephen Roberts, yet one more member of the Hedgehogs, added, "And it smells like a double cheese burger." **
The captain of the yellow team merely snorted.
This is the first point ever scored by a Hedgehog in a game. The team was obviously stoked. Next week the team goes on to the tournament in Men's Open.
Cerbus had earlier in the day declared his optimism for the team's success.
"I think we're going to win tonight," he said while lounging in a desk chair waiting for Professor Parrish to commence Art History 227.
"Yeah, right," Young replied.
Young had earlier in the semester declared mistrust in Cerbus's lofty optimism, for example, when he claimed he had 'studied' for a test while watching a movie with his girlfriend. She said she has more trust in him after he got an A on the test. She is also slightly miffed because she studied all night and received exactly the same grade as Cerbus did.
The time and date of the next Hedgehogs game is yet to be determined. The location is most likely the soccer fields behind the Co-Rec.
*Some quotes may have been made up.
**OK, OK, this one is fabricated as well. Please be assured that this journalist usually adheres to much higher journalistic standards. You may view some of her real work here.
Sara Young, Hedgehog player, benchwarmer and cheerleader, said, "It was amazing. I've never seen that happen before." Young declined to comment on why she is on a soccer team in the Men's Open division.
John Cavanaugh, another Hedgehog player, said, "I smell victory!" *
Stephen Roberts, yet one more member of the Hedgehogs, added, "And it smells like a double cheese burger." **
The captain of the yellow team merely snorted.
This is the first point ever scored by a Hedgehog in a game. The team was obviously stoked. Next week the team goes on to the tournament in Men's Open.
Cerbus had earlier in the day declared his optimism for the team's success.
"I think we're going to win tonight," he said while lounging in a desk chair waiting for Professor Parrish to commence Art History 227.
"Yeah, right," Young replied.
Young had earlier in the semester declared mistrust in Cerbus's lofty optimism, for example, when he claimed he had 'studied' for a test while watching a movie with his girlfriend. She said she has more trust in him after he got an A on the test. She is also slightly miffed because she studied all night and received exactly the same grade as Cerbus did.
The time and date of the next Hedgehogs game is yet to be determined. The location is most likely the soccer fields behind the Co-Rec.
*Some quotes may have been made up.
**OK, OK, this one is fabricated as well. Please be assured that this journalist usually adheres to much higher journalistic standards. You may view some of her real work here.
posted by SaraY @ 10:20 PM
3 Comments:
At 06 April, 2006 15:34 ,
Anonymous said...
Best post ever!
And yeah, you know the quotes were fabricated when you have John talking.
At 06 April, 2006 22:51 ,
Anonymous said...
This blog in no way reflects my views. Clearly if I were talking about good smells, I would be talking about gummy worms. Cheeseburgers are hardly my favorite smell. I worked at stinking Steak n Shake. So, no more made up facts about what I didn't say.
At 07 April, 2006 14:00 ,
Anonymous said...
Haha, the last name of one of the people in the soybean article is "Pinto". That's hilarious.
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